Thursday, May 24, 2007

Let's Watch A Girl Get Beaten To Death

These words from Whedonesque. From Joss Whedon, the creator of Buffy and Angel. These words about our humanity, or lack of, are so powerfully put, I can't think of more to add other than these.

When the World Trade Center Towers fell (I still see them falling in my mind's eye), I thought, how's Hollywood going to beat that? When they started televising the war in Iraq and the war in Israel and Palestine, I saw the heads and bodies of decapitated men. I watched people picking up the pieces, literally, of someone who had been blown apart. I saw a man pick up what looked like another man's liver and hold it up to the sky, and my stomach turned. I stopped watching the war on television. I was afraid that I might be so desensitized to violence that nothing would be abhorrent anymore. As my colleague Calhoun said, this is a call to arms. Dissolving our humanity is something we've become good at. Turn away from the girlfriend being abused on the street. She may be homeless, after all. Ignore the children getting bullied by their peers. They're someone else's kids, not yours. Pretend like you don't hear any of those homophobic, racist, sexist comments made by people you know and people you don't in public and private. I mean, come on, it's not your place to correct them, right?

Wrong.

Here's Joss.

Let's Watch A Girl Get Beaten To Death. This is not my blog, but I don’t have a blog, or a space, and I’d like to be heard for a bit.

Last month seventeen year old Dua Khalil was pulled into a crowd of young men, some of them (the instigators) family, who then kicked and stoned her to death. This is an example of the breath-taking oxymoron “honor killing”, in which a family member (almost always female) is murdered for some religious or ethical transgression. Dua Khalil, who was of the Yazidi faith, had been seen in the company of a Sunni Muslim, and possibly suspected of having married him or converted. That she was torturously murdered for this is not, in fact, a particularly uncommon story. But now you can watch the action up close on CNN. Because as the girl was on the ground trying to get up, her face nothing but red, the few in the group of more than twenty men who were not busy kicking her and hurling stones at her were filming the event with their camera-phones.

There were security officers standing outside the area doing nothing, but the footage of the murder was taken – by more than one phone – from the front row. Which means whoever shot it did so not to record the horror of the event, but to commemorate it. To share it. Because it was cool.

I could start a rant about the level to which we have become desensitized to violence, about the evils of the voyeuristic digital world in which everything is shown and everything is game, but honestly, it’s been said. And I certainly have no jingoistic cultural agenda. I like to think that in America this would be considered unbearably appalling, that Kitty Genovese is still remembered, that we are more evolved. But coincidentally, right before I stumbled on this vid I watched the trailer for “Captivity”.

A few of you may know that I took public exception to the billboard campaign for this film, which showed a concise narrative of the kidnapping, torture and murder of a sexy young woman. I wanted to see if the film was perhaps more substantial (especially given the fact that it was directed by “The Killing Fields” Roland Joffe) than the exploitive ad campaign had painted it. The trailer resembles nothing so much as the CNN story on Dua Khalil. Pretty much all you learn is that Elisha Cuthbert is beautiful, then kidnapped, inventively, repeatedly and horrifically tortured, and that the first thing she screams is “I’m sorry”.

“I’m sorry.”

What is wrong with women?

I mean wrong. Physically. Spiritually. Something unnatural, something destructive, something that needs to be corrected.

How did more than half the people in the world come out incorrectly? I have spent a good part of my life trying to do that math, and I’m no closer to a viable equation. And I have yet to find a culture that doesn’t buy into it. Women’s inferiority – in fact, their malevolence -- is as ingrained in American popular culture as it is anywhere they’re sporting burkhas. I find it in movies, I hear it in the jokes of colleagues, I see it plastered on billboards, and not just the ones for horror movies. Women are weak. Women are manipulative. Women are somehow morally unfinished. (Objectification: another tangential rant avoided.) And the logical extension of this line of thinking is that women are, at the very least, expendable.

I try to think how we got here. The theory I developed in college (shared by many I’m sure) is one I have yet to beat: Womb Envy. Biology: women are generally smaller and weaker than men. But they’re also much tougher. Put simply, men are strong enough to overpower a woman and propagate. Women are tough enough to have and nurture children, with or without the aid of a man. Oh, and they’ve also got the equipment to do that, to be part of the life cycle, to create and bond in a way no man ever really will. Somewhere a long time ago a bunch of men got together and said, “If all we do is hunt and gather, let’s make hunting and gathering the awesomest achievement, and let’s make childbirth kinda weak and shameful.” It’s a rather silly simplification, but I believe on a mass, unconscious level, it’s entirely true. How else to explain the fact that cultures who would die to eradicate each other have always agreed on one issue? That every popular religion puts restrictions on women’s behavior that are practically untenable? That the act of being a free, attractive, self-assertive woman is punishable by torture and death? In the case of this upcoming torture-porn, fictional. In the case of Dua Khalil, mundanely, unthinkably real. And both available for your viewing pleasure.

It’s safe to say that I’ve snapped. That something broke, like one of those robots you can conquer with a logical conundrum. All my life I’ve looked at this faulty equation, trying to understand, and I’ve shorted out. I don’t pretend to be a great guy; I know really really well about objectification, trust me. And I’m not for a second going down the “women are saints” route – that just leads to more stone-throwing (and occasional Joan-burning). I just think there is the staggering imbalance in the world that we all just take for granted. If we were all told the sky was evil, or at best a little embarrassing, and we ought not look at it, wouldn’t that tradition eventually fall apart? (I was going to use ‘trees’ as my example, but at the rate we’re getting rid of them I’m pretty sure we really do think they’re evil. See how all rants become one?)

Now those of you who frequent this site are, in my wildly biased opinion, fairly evolved. You may hear nothing new here. You may be way ahead of me. But I can’t contain my despair, for Dua Khalil, for humanity, for the world we’re shaping. Those of you who have followed the link I set up know that it doesn’t bring you to a video of a murder. It brings you to a place of sanity, of people who have never stopped asking the question of what is wrong with this world and have set about trying to change the answer. Because it’s no longer enough to be a decent person. It’s no longer enough to shake our heads and make concerned grimaces at the news. True enlightened activism is the only thing that can save humanity from itself. I’ve always had a bent towards apocalyptic fiction, and I’m beginning to understand why. I look and I see the earth in flames. Her face was nothing but red.

All I ask is this: Do something. Try something. Speaking out, showing up, writing a letter, a check, a strongly worded e-mail. Pick a cause – there are few unworthy ones. And nudge yourself past the brink of tacit support to action. Once a month, once a year, or just once. If you can’t think of what to do, there is this handy link. Even just learning enough about a subject so you can speak against an opponent eloquently makes you an unusual personage. Start with that. Any one of you would have cried out, would have intervened, had you been in that crowd in Bashiqa. Well thanks to digital technology, you’re all in it now.

I have never had any faith in humanity. But I will give us props on this: if we can evolve, invent and theorize our way into the technologically magical, culturally diverse and artistically magnificent race we are and still get people to buy the idiotic idea that half of us are inferior, we’re pretty amazing. Let our next sleight of hand be to make that myth disappear.

The sky isn’t evil. Try looking up.

8 You Talkin' To Me?:

5cents said...

you gone done it now roti

2Shay said...

Hey!!! What happened to my comment? Did you not like what I have to say? *sniff sniff*

The Chapatikid said...

Paanch Anna, What have I gone done?

2Shay, What comment?! I'm so confused now. Did you leave a comment and it didn't appear? I haven't deleted anything. I don't moderate my comments, and I didn't even get a notification that you had posted one. Hm. Strange. It would be great if you could repost.

2Shay said...

I'll do my best, but you know what I think of do-overs.

I know I'll get shit for this, so feel free to moderate the hell out of it.

First, I feel for Khalil, I really do. But I just thought Whedon was a little hard on the human race. Believe me I know about the subjugation of women; a man offered cattle for my sister's hand in marriage in Pakistan. In thirty-five degree (centrigrade) heat my sister couldn't wear shorts in down town Karachi for fear of reprisal. Although she laughs it off now, I'm sure at the time, it must've have been one of the most demeaning experiences of her life. Granted, it didn't happen to me and, being a guy, I could never truly empathise with her.

It just struck me as unfair to not acknowledge the strides we have made. Are we all the way there yet? No, not even close. However, in some cases the pendulum swung too far to the other side. The following are the thoughts of Bill Maher and I will pilfer from him to make my point.

If I were to go on a talk show and say "women are smarter than men" I would be applauded, however, if I were to say "men are smarter than women" I would get booed off the stage. If you look at most "family sitcoms" the wife is always smart beautiful and ethereal, while the husband is some dumb schmuck lucky to have found her.

Also in two relatively oppressive countries, India and Pakistan, they have both elected female heads of state.

None of this should dilute the atrocity of what happened to Ms. Khalil, but I just wish Mr. Whedon wouldn't make it sound like we're still completely in the dark ages.

May be I've completely missed his point and am way off base on this?

The Chapatikid said...

I don't think he's doing that at all. And I don't think he's putting men down. You'd be surprised how many women are of the same mindset. Our gender biases have been ingrained since generations, and not only do many men think that way, but many women too. You've sort of missed the point of Whedon's argument. I don't think he's saying we're still in the "dark ages" as you put it. What he's saying is that we're increasingly silent spectators (both men and women) of the injustices that are committed upon the historically oppressed. Sure, women have made huge strides -- AGAINST the will of men, I might add -- to get voting rights, to allow for women to be priests, to work as hard and be rewarded as much. You'd be surprised to know that in Bombay, there are more women holding top-ranking positions in companies than in most cities in North America. It's not about what country you come from. It's about what you've been taught -- how you've been taught to treat women. Why is it that as soon as a woman gets pregnant in Japan, it is automatically assumed that she will resign from her job? Why is it that here, I have a friend whose boss actually got PISSED OFF with her because she got pregnant? She was a new hire, and they were investing in her, and she accidentally got pregnant. And he was ready to fire her, but couldn't, because of the law. But he would have if he could have, we all know it.

Re: tv shows and bumbling men and smart women. There's another classic stereotype if there were any. She's the smart, sexy, stylish wife who not only keeps the household together, but brings home some dosh as well. Ten years ago, she was just a housewife. Now, she's a working woman too. If you think these are positive portrayals of women (babying her husband, knocking him around, giving him attitude, acting like she knows it all), think again. These are "aspirational" portrayals of women. Not real ones.

Absolutely, you'd get booed off stage if you said men were smarter than women. It's simply not true.
:-)

The Chapatikid said...

To add to my point about women making strides: women are where they are because of the battles they've fought. Women have initiated the struggle for everything they have achieved today, not men. Sure, men offered support, joined the cause, but how many? Why didn't women have the right to vote when men did? What happened to women after they started working during the war to support their families? Women have been historically oppressed, and everything we have today, is because our mothers and grandmothers fought to give it to us.

5cents said...

Women are historically oppressed? Hmm, there are many instances of the oppression of women but I think that statement is too simplistic. Also, women are where they are today because of the battles they fought? No battles were fought and if you really look at it, the status quo has, inevitably, been maintained. I'd go into detail but this is a huge topic. Perhaps...

5cents said...

I finally got an answer to this at the Back Womb. It may or may not be provocative and opinionated. You should comment :p